What do games such as Word of Warcraft, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Black Desert Online, Guild Wars 2, Super Mario Bros. 2, Suikoden 2, Final Fantasy XIV, Grand Theft Auto V, and Rust have in common? Food! What else do all of these video games have in common? They lack cucumbers! In fact, when was the last time you ever saw a cucumber in a video game? Let alone a cucumber sandwich.
Which is why we are taking a look at the humble, criminally overlooked cucumber sandwich and whether or not it can be the perfect gaming snack for devoted gamers like yourself. Whether you play on PC, console, or your phone with a keyboard and mouse, controller, or swiping on a screen, this installment of Food for Gaming is going to evaluate the cucumber sandwich’s potential by rating it on taste, handling, finger residue, and forkability.
After all, eating and gaming go hand-in-hand and we want to find the best snacks and food to complement your gaming without leaving your peripherals looking like the aftermath of a zombie horde after it has devoured your character because you suck at zombie games.
Taste – A Fresh and Light Bite
By itself, the cucumber is refreshing (like water) and crisp. It doesn’t overwhelm the taste buds and provides a subtle flavor used to cleanse one’s palate. But as a sandwich, it can still retain those elements of being refreshing and crisp while adding creaminess via the spread used in addition to the bread to keep it all together.
It’s simple, easy to make, and yet can be adjusted to your preferences whether it is bland like Paine’s personality from Final Fantasy X-2 or ragingly hot like Kratos’s temper in God of War. However, for this review, we are keeping it simple.
White or wheat bread, thinly sliced cucumber (with or without the skin), and a cream cheese spread, rather than butter, seasoned with dill, salt, pepper, and mayonnaise. It doesn’t get any simpler and will be an excellent snack that tastes crisp, refreshing, and creamy. Though, for those of you who prefer intense tastes when it comes to their snacks and food, the basic cucumber sandwich might be underwhelming.
Like your skills when it comes to playing Hunt: Showdown…
Taste Rating: 4.5/5
Handling – One-Handed Ease
When it comes to handling food, sandwiches were made with that specifically in mind. Being able to quickly make it and eat it without any disruption to your work, hobby, or daily life, sandwiches fulfill that role perfectly. Unless you are one of those people that puts all kinds of things in the sandwich to the point it’s bloated, like most Ubisoft games, to the point that you can’t hold it in your hand let alone take a proper bite.
Not so with the cucumber sandwich. It is thin and easy to swiftly pick up faster than Sonic grabbing a chili dog for a quick bite without pausing the game. And you won’t have to worry about any potential mess or it slipping out of your hand.
That is, unless you decide to use really thick slices of bread, too many additions, or some kind of spread that quickly gets absorbed by the bread and makes it moist.
If you didn’t do any of those things, then the handling factor is top notch!
Handling Rating: 5/5
Finger Residue – Clean Gaming Sessions
So how will your gaming peripherals hold up as you snack your way through while your character is wilting away in Don’t Starve? Aside from you being a sick individual for doing that, your controllers, mouse, keyboard, and touchscreen will only be affected by the natural oils from your fingers rather than anything from the cucumber sandwich.
Cucumber sandwiches leave virtually no finger residue which ensures your gaming peripheral of choice will remain clean. And you won’t have to take that extra second to wipe off your fingers except as an ingrained reflex or tick that comes from thousands of hours mechanically eating while you sit in front of a screen.
Unless, as stated before, you gave it an excessively moist filling and, in that case, it is your fault and not the sandwich’s!
Finger Residue Rating: 5/5
Forkability – Optional but Handy
If you need to use a fork to eat a cucumber sandwich, then I’m going to assume your intelligence is on par with the Soldier from Team Fortress 2. I don’t know why anyone would stick a fork into a cucumber sandwich and try to eat it.
Sure, you could use your fork to cut the sandwich into pieces, but that could backfire if you have weak wrists and the cucumber slices are thick, resulting in the cucumber shooting across your room like a hockey puck and smacking into the screen.
And, let’s be honest, most gamers have weak wrists.
But if you want to fork the cucumber sandwich, you can. It just isn’t ideal.
Forkability Rating: 3/5
Overall Verdict – A Winning Snack for Gamers
It is clear that the cucumber sandwich is an almost perfect choice when it comes to Food for Gaming. It leaves no mess, it is easy to handle, and a piece of cake to make (which is not a lie).The cucumber sandwich is also budget friendly and you can impress your friends and family by using nothing more than one of the many shot glasses you have on the shelf and using it to cut four circles in the bread, or a cheap salt and pepper shaker like I did for the ones I made in the pictures, to make those small, fancy-looking circular sandwiches. Which makes the handling even easier!
And what do you do with the leftover bread scraps? Make bread pudding!
Which we can talk about another time.
Suffice to say, cucumber sandwiches prove to be an excellent choice for gaming. They offer a delightful taste that won’t overpower your senses, are easy to handle with one hand, leave no messy residue, and can be enjoyed without or, if you really need to, with utensils.
It’s a smart and satisfying gaming snack choice for the gamer with mature taste buds. Though I doubt you Mountain Dew chugging, Dorito powder sniffing, buffalo wing addicts will appreciate the humble and criminally overlooked cucumber sandwich.
It’s time for the cucumber to be added to the list of video game foods.
So remind your favorite video game developers to forget the nukes, remember the cukes!
In the meantime, tell us what you think about cucumber sandwiches and do you have your own recipe? Shout out in the comments section below or on social media and offer up suggestions on what food or snacks we should rate next!
Overall Rating: 4.5/5
Food for Gaming Recipe: Creamy Cucumber Sandwiches
Ingredients:
– 1 cucumber, thinly sliced
– 8 slices of white or whole wheat bread
– 4 ounces (115 grams) cream cheese or butter, softened
– 2 tablespoons mayonnaise
– 1 teaspoon fresh dill, chopped (optional)
– Salt and pepper to taste
-Optional toppings – tomatoes, cheese, jalapenos, onions, deli meat
-Optional seasonings – paprika, smoked paprika, cayenne pepper, finely chopped mint (like the Queen of England), garlic powder
Instructions:
- In a bowl, mix the softened cream cheese, mayonnaise, chopped dill (if using), salt, and pepper until well combined.
- Lay out the bread slices, and spread the cream cheese mixture evenly on four of them.
- Place a layer of thinly sliced cucumber on top of the cream cheese-covered slices.
- Top with the remaining bread slices to create sandwiches.
- Carefully cut off the crusts from each sandwich, if desired.
- Cut the sandwiches into halves or quarters for easy handling or into circles with a cutter, shot glass, or a round salt and pepper shaker.
These creamy cucumber sandwiches are perfect for gaming marathons, providing a crisp, cool, and satisfying snack that won’t distract you from your favorite games. Enjoy!
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